


And I miss you in the June gloom too

by Maisie_top_trash



Series: Unseen - Fear Will Lose [28]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Grief, M/M, PTSD, Paranoia, Potential trigger - war, Recovery, idk - Freeform, im so fucking lazy with tags, mental health, other stuff?, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-14
Packaged: 2018-12-29 20:34:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12092901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maisie_top_trash/pseuds/Maisie_top_trash
Summary: Unseen Fear Will Lose is a series of single chapter stories showing unseen scenes from the same universe as my main story, Fear Will Lose. In order to fully enjoy these extra bits, I recommend you go and read that first.Fear Will LoseTo escape the triggering sounds of the Fourth of July fireworks, Todd takes his family up into the safety of the woods. Things don't exactly go to plan.





	And I miss you in the June gloom too

**Author's Note:**

> Yo I'm English what is Fourth of July

"Now then Missy, why exactly is Mr Nibbles in your bag?" Tyler asked as he took the hamster in his ball out of Isabel's suitcase.  
"He's gonna be lonely Papa!"  
"Uncle Zacky's gonna look after him, he won't be lonely."  
"He only likes me though Papa! He might be scared of Uncle Zacky! I don't want him scared! Pleeease Papa!"  
"You're a brave boy, aren't ya Mr Nibbles?" He took the light ginger animal out of the plastic ball and carried it over to the cage in the corner of her room. The hamster squeaked as he put him back down on the sawdust then turned back to his daughter. "See, he said yes,"  
"Daddy said I could take him."  
"No he didn't, and don't go telling porky pies cheeky." Tyler went back to her suitcase and continued to go through it.

"Sweetheart, we're going to stay in a log cabin in Colorado, why exactly do you need your karate outfit?"  
"It's called my karategi Papa," Isabel told him, pulling the white fabric and purple belt from his grip.  
"Why do you need it?"  
"In case I need to fight!"  
"No fighting, it's just us and Daddy's friends, you don't need to fight them."  
"What about if there is a bear?"  
"A bear?! Oh no! Quick! Suit up! There's a bear right behind you Is!" Tyler gasped and the young girl turned to look for it, giving him the opportunity to grab her biggest teddy bear without her noticing, then suddenly growling and attacking her with its soft paws.

"Rawwww,"  
"Aahhhhh!" She squealed excitedly.  
"I'm going to eat you! Rawww!!!"  
"Noooo!"  
"Quick! Use your ninja powers!" Tyler broke character and she giggled then raised her fists in a cute version of fighting stance.  
"Kiai!" Isabel cried out then kicked the bear right in its stomach and Tyler let the toy fly out of his hands and across the room.

"Wow! Thanks for saving me, you're my hero!"  
"See papa, I have to take my karategi." She climbed onto his lap.  
"You can take it and be chief bear fighter, but that means we've got to take all these princess outfits out. I mean we're only going for 3 days, why do you need 5 different princess dresses?" Tyler asked as he took out the cheap and most likely highly flammable costumes.  
"Only 4! This is Alice from wonderland! She's not a princess!"  
"Well think about this rationally, do we really really need 4 princess dresses and 1 Alice dress? Or do you think maybe it's a better idea to get some warm jumpers and pants?"  
"I really really need them!"  
"And if we go hiking in the forest? You're sure you want to wear a princess dress?"  
"Yeh!"  
"What if gets snagged on a plant, it might get ripped."  
"No!"  
"No, exactly, so should we back some other clothes except princess dresses and karate clothes? And should we stop letting William help you pack for holidays?" Tyler asked and she giggled.

"We're going for 3 days, so we need some spares but not many, I think we need 2 pairs of leggings, 2 pairs of shorts, 4 tops, 5 pairs of socks and panties, pyjamas, 2 cardigans, a coat, maybe a pretty dress to wear to dinner if you'd like?"  
"And my karategi!"  
"If there's room, but the other things have to come first, yeah?"  
"Sorry, can I steal you for a minute Papa?" Todd poked his head round the door and made eye contact with Tyler.  
"Yep. I'll be really quick Isabel, why don't you start by getting out 4 tops and 2 pairs of leggings?"  
"Okay Papa." She nodded so he followed his fiancé out of their daughter's room and across the landing the their bedroom.

"Everything okay babe?" Tyler closed the door behind them then turned to face Todd, wearing a tight white shirt tucked into his official army pants. He watched for a moment as his fiancé paced for a moment, uncharacteristically stressed as he breathed heavily and scratched his jaw.  
"I can't find his tags."  
"Huh?"  
"Peter's tags, I can't find them anywhere and we've got a flight to catch in 3 hours and we're about to go and see all the guys and I can't believe I've fucking lost them. This is supposed to be a reunion, how can we reunite when I've lost the last memories of a member of our team?!" Todd panicked.  
"Alright, just sit down, they're in the sock drawer."  
"They're not, I checked."  
"I'll check again." Tyler told him calmly then waited for him to sit on the bed before going over to the chest of drawers and pulling the top one open. Usually the silver dog tags on a chain that Todd's best friend once wore were in a box that came with a watch that he'd bought and recycled the packing of, but Tyler couldn't find the square package that was always there normally.

"Told you."  
"Don't panic, alright? Nobody broke in and rummaged through our hole ridden socks to find his tags, which means that either you've accidentally put them down somewhere or the kids have mistakenly moved them. Both of which are solvable issues, yeah?"  
"I just, I, I,"  
"You're anxious about the fireworks and about seeing the army guys, I know, I understand, and I want you to know that I 100% support you and will have your back without exception for as long as you need me."  
"Mmm."  
"Do your absolute best not to worry about anything this weekend, I'm on kid duty, anything else you need, I've got it covered. This is your vacation, okay? This trip is all about you and making sure that you're in a safe place, a good place, and I'll do everything in my power to make that a reality."  
"Thank you Tyler."  
"You're welcome. I've just pulled a live hamster and half of Disney's costume department out of Issy's bag, so my best guess is that she's done an impression of a magpie and taken his tags without realising. You stay here, calm down, I'll go have a proper look."

 

  
"...and if one green bottle should accidentally falllll, they'll be no green bottles sitting on the wall!" Tyler and the two kids finally finished the car song whilst Todd just tutted and shook his head disapprovingly.  
"Again again!" Isabel begged hyperly.  
"But this time from a thousand!" William joined in, maybe a little sarcastically or maybe just cheekily.  
"We're only about 5 minutes out guys, so you'll have to sing it double time." Todd said whilst driving through the small forest road in the rental car they had got from the airport.

The trip to Colorado was both a vacation and a tradition that Todd had invited Tyler to become a part of for the past 4 years. William had been going up to the massive log cabin since he was born, and this year marked Isabel's second trip. Although it was true that the forest was incredibly beautiful, more importantly it made a perfect escape for the group of soldiers from the PTSD triggers that came hand in hand with the fireworks that would be let off in their home cities on Fourth of July, tomorrow. Rather than risk flashbacks and memories, they decided to take themselves away and hide in the woods till it was done, and the reunion was just an added bonus.

"Daddy Papa! A bambi! A real bambi!"  
"Sweetpea, what kind of animal is bambi really?"  
"I don't know."  
"Will? You gonna help your sis out?"  
"Bambi's a baby doe which is a girl deer," the 12 year old told her.  
"You're gonna be seeing lots of them out here sweetheart, they all live in the forest."  
"And, a-and we live in the forest!"  
"That's right angel."

"Look up there guys," Todd pointed. "Can you see the house?"  
"Yeah!!" Their 7 year old daughter squeaked excitedly, her small feet kicking into the back of Tyler's seat.  
"I see Uncle Tom's car." William said.  
"Bet that idiot drove all the way from Tulsa just to show it off," Todd laughed as they turned off the mud road and onto the flat parking area in front of the 3 story log cabin that was more on the luxury side than the traditional.

"Right, go and say hi to everyone first if you want, but don't leave Dad and me to carry in all the bags by ourselves, okay?" Tyler said as they came to a stop and everyone unbuckled. "Okay?"  
"Yeessss Popp," the both groaned before climbing out of the car. Tyler's feet had barely made contact with the ground before both of the children had run out of eyesight, and he couldn't help but laugh a little whilst walking round to the other side of the car.

"Oh look who finally decided to rock up." Tom walked over to them, his pregnant wife Ellie by his side and smile on his face.  
"Our flight got delayed 3 hours, plus, you know, didn't want to see you."  
"Shut up you idiot, how the devil are you? Long time no see." He shook Todd's hand then pulled him into a hug.  
"We're good we're good."

"Hi Ellie, nice to see you," Tyler looked away and instead greeted the woman with a hug.  
"Hey," she squeezed back. "You guys look great, how are you?"  
"Us? How about you, little one's just about ready to pop hey?"  
"8 months down, 1 to go,"  
"You're looking beautiful El," Todd agreed then hugged her himself, and Tyler went round the back and shook Tom's hand, the soldier's grip tight and persistent.  
"Good to see you again Ty,"  
"You too, and congratulations on number 3,"  
"Thank you man," he still shook Tyler's hand. "Where are your two rotters?"  
"Been cramped up on planes and in cars, run off somewhere to stretch out, don't expect to see them anytime soon." Tyler laughed and his hand was finally released.

"Are the others here?" Todd asked, stepping back and wrapping his arm around Tyler's waist affectionately.  
"Uhh yep, Towerblock's already gone on a beer run-"  
"Typical."  
"But Florence Nightingale's just inside, we can go in if you'd like, want a hand with your bags?"  
"Nah, Papa Ty already laid down the law with the kids, can't go undermining him,"  
"Not to his face at least." Tom laughed.  
"You're an idiot. Come on Papa Ty, let's leave these two clowns to it, go find ourselves something to drink." Ellie tutted.  
"Sounds perfect." He smiled and followed after her towards their home for the next few days.

 

 

On paper, the trip didn't seem like something Tyler would enjoy. Not only being in a place that he wasn't familiar with alongside people who weren't familiar with the severity of his conditions, but also being surrounded by people who had fought in wars and risked their lives for the country whilst he was just an elementary school music teacher. Being a gay musician would have been plenty of reasons for the butch soldiers to isolate him, but for some reason, they didn't. And he loved them for it.

Watching Todd interact with his old army unit made Tyler so happy because they made him so happy. They'd been through Hell together, it was undeniable, but there was also a chemistry and a bond that came with that torture and it meant for a lasting friendship.

So even though Tyler wasn't in on the action at that given moment, he liked being able to sit on one of the many couches in the massive living area with a sleeping baby on his chest and a smile on his face whilst watching the three men and one woman laughing together as they shared stories.

He briefly looked away from his fiancé and co, and looked down to the 4 month old baby Rose he was holding close. She was Towerblock's youngest daughter and her mom had been playing with Isabel, so in return Tyler had offered to rock the baby to sleep and had been subsequently stuck on the couch ever since. He breathed in her distinctive baby scent, knowing he would probably never have a young baby of his own, but being okay with that.

Back when OCD thoughts were strong, holding a baby was simply unimaginable. Constant obsessions over potentially harming a child were so gripping that at one point he had struggled to even look at a picture of his brother's firstborn, so holding the little girl was not only a joy but also a massive success. A success that he was proud of.

"Babe," Todd squeezed his shoulder whilst whispering slightly and leaning down close from behind the couch.  
"Hmm?"  
"We're going to hoist Peter's tags in a minute, and I was wondering whether you'd like us to attach Josh's necklace too? Obviously you don't have to say any words if you don't want to, but if you'd appreciate the gesture and think he would too then that's something we can do."  
"Oh, uhh," Tyler took a moment to think, not having prepared for the situation. "I think, uh,"  
"You don't have to."  
"Yeah, I think I won't, if that's okay,"  
"More than okay." He reassured him then kissed him on the cheek quickly and stoop up straight. "Want a drink?"  
"Nah I'm alright thanks. And Todd, I'm really glad you're having a good time."  
"I am, thank you Ty. Right, I'm gonna grab a case and then I think we're all gonna go out."  
"Okay, lemme just dump this baby somewhere." Tyler replied and Todd laughed as he headed towards the kitchen.

He planted a small soft kiss on her small soft head, then carefully stood up and bounce-walked over towards where her mother, Jess, was playing with Isabel and her other daughter Emma. They looked like they were having fun, and Isabel grinned when she saw him.

"Hey guys, I think we're going to put the flag up now if you want to watch?"  
"Yeah!" Both Isabel and Emma cried out then ran towards the pole outside.  
"Want me to take her?" Jess stood up.  
"She's asleep, I can put her in her cot if you want?"  
"Oh wow, well done, she's usually quite a little madam."  
"She's been a delight,"  
"Aw bless," she smiled. "But it's okay thanks Ty, I need to run up to my room to grab my camera anyway, I'll just take her with me."  
"Okeydokes," he carefully and gently passed her baby back to her, instantly missing the warmth against his chest.  
"Thanks Ty,"  
"No worries."

Tyler stretched his arms out a little then started walking out of the house and out onto the deck where the flagpole stood proudly. He took a quick private moment to pat his chest and feel Josh's old cross pendant and wedding ring under his shirt, close to his heart, but was interrupted by Towerblock patting him on the back.

"You seen that wife of mine bud?"  
"She's taking little Rose up to bed."  
"Ah okay, perfect, and how about that boyfriend of yours?"  
"Fiancé now man," Tyler reminded him with a smile.  
"Oh yeah, my bad, forgot he finally popped the question."  
"Haha that's okay, and I think he's just gone to get some beers."  
"You drinking this year?"  
"Nope, still dry."  
"How long has it been?"  
"Oooo," he tried to work it out. "Coming up to 20 years now."  
"Jees," the soldier shook his head in disbelief. "Respect man, serious respect."

"I have the flaaag," someone announced, and Tyler turned to see Tom carrying a neatly folded triangle, the traditional military way. Just behind him was Todd and a pied piper esque stream of children, all wanting to come and stand around the flagpole. Todd and Tyler were the smallest family with just 2 children, and Tyler loved being surrounded by so many, he loved kids and it was why he worked in an elementary school and why he hoped to adopt so many more in the future.

"You okay?" Tyler found William in the growing crowd and wrapped an arm around his son's shoulders. Because Todd had been discharged from the army so much younger than all his friends, and had a son almost immediately, William was the oldest child there by 3 years. It did concern Tyler because he didn't want him to feel isolated or be left out, but had to remind himself that William was a lot stronger than he gave him credit for.

"Bored I guess." He shrugged. "How are you?"  
"Me? I'm good thanks." Tyler smiled at him, but noticed the distrust in his eyes. It had only been a matter of weeks since the boy had learnt about his mental health conditions and history, and he was still trying to come to terms with it. "William, I'm okay."  
"Definitely?"  
"Definitely." He squeezed him tight.

"Should we start?" Tom said from the other side of the decking, and everyone turned to face him and organised in rough family groups in a rough semi circle, Isabel running over to Tyler and instantly being lifted onto his hip. Todd was stood next to Tom and was attaching the American flag to the pulley system, but noticed Tyler looking and gave him a warm smile.

"Happy Fourth of July everybody," he started, raising his beer.  
"Happy Fourth of July," everyone else echoed back in various forms, those with their own drinks clinking each other.  
"Today is obviously a joyous day of celebration for our great country's birthday, and a reminder of how blessed and how privileged we are to live here. As a proud American citizen who exercises his right to freedom every single day, I appreciate those who fought for it and those who continue to fight for it to this day. If it wasn’t for the soldiers who fought in the Revolutionary war and all the other wars that protected our freedoms, we wouldn't be as free as we are today. But, as we all know, every single solider has had to make huge sacrifices, and every single support system for every single soldier has had to go above and beyond. So yes, today is a day of celebration for America, but it's also a celebration of veterans, of active service men and women, of service wives and husbands, of service children. And today is also a day of thanks and of remembrance for those who stepped forward to defend our country, and never came home."

Tyler felt Isabel nestle closer to his chest and he planted a kiss on her black hair, then pulled William closer and squeezed him tighter. Although the little girl was younger, the older boy had lived with his father's PTSD for his whole life and Tyler knew that it had a huge impact on him where the pair lived alone. So Tyler held him close and had no intention of letting go any time soon.

"Losing one of our own, that won't ever feel okay. It's something that I know I battle with on almost a daily basis, and probably will continue to do so for many days to come. And I think one of the most important things each and everyone of us can do is lean on each other and use opportunities like today to talk and to share and to remember, and on that note, boss?"  
"Thanks Tom," Todd took a step forward, Peter's tags in his hands. "Peter was my best friend, but you all know that. Every year we come here and we hoist his name and we talk the evening away with stories of our time with him, and every year is gets easier for me."

"The first few years, 4 or 5 years after we lost him and I left the army, even saying his name was too difficult and thinking about him was simply impossible. I had my gorgeous boy, my son, and I threw myself into raising him and the finance sector of all things, and I crammed my life with distractions as an alternative to dealing with the reality. Then I met a man-"  
"You," Isabel whispered and he smiled and kissed her again whilst Todd kept talking, not hearing.  
"-who had a loss of his own, and a much braver and ultimately much more effective coping mechanism than me, and that was communication. It took time and a whole lot of patience, but he taught me where to start and how to keep going, and I'm forever thankful to him because it changed my life for the better. It's because of that U-turn in my mindset that I've been able to come and talk every year and raise Peter's tags rather than hide them and therefore him away."

"What I'm trying to say is that communication is important, talk about what you're feeling, be open about what you're thinking and healing will soon follow. We've all been lucky enough to find love in this world and have a family unit of our own. Families are a team, and teams rely on each other. And not only do we have our blood, but all of us together make up one big family who use each other for healing, and use tonight for healing." Todd spoke and Tyler's heart pounded and the tears in his eyes swelled.

"Death is eternal, but grief doesn't have to be." His fiancé told the group, and Isabel reached down Tyler's shirt and fished out Josh's necklace, sliding the big wedding ring over her small thumb and holding the cross in her palm, and for some reason the innocence and the warmth pushed the tears over the edge and down Tyler's cheeks.

"Losing someone you love leaves a hole in your life, and it can be tempting to try and fill that hole with other things, patch it over and act like it's not there and it never was, but it's important to remember that that hole is a human being, it's someone you love. You can't simply pretend they never existed and you can't simply force them out of your mind. Sometimes you just need to let life run it's course, with the odd little guiding hand to show it the right road. It's up to us to pick those roads, and today I ask that you pick openness, honesty, and trust." Todd looked Tyler right in the eyes as he said those words. "And today I'm going to be open and say that I'm scared of not doing Peter justice with this speech or this weekend or this life. But I won't hide from that fear, I'll use it to fuel me and power me forwards, and I urge you all to do the same. So, on that note, I'd like to hoist the flag."

Todd turned his back on the group and took a moment to thread Peter's tags through the grommet of the flag, then turned to Tom and nodded. The still serving soldier started pulling the cord and brought the flag up the pole in four steady tugs. Whilst he secured it, Towerblock and Flo both joined them, then all 4 soldiers, Todd leading, saluted the flag and held their position for several seconds.

When they were at ease again, everyone naturally started to clap and hug one another, but not saying a word. They all simply reflected on Todd's words and let them truly hit home.

"A minute of silence please, for Peter and for Josh." Todd half announced half requested, and was obeyed without exception. Tyler's fiancé found his way over and rested his hand on William's shoulder whilst Isabel hid herself against Ty's chest. He wasn't completely sure, but he was fairly convinced that the little girl was crying just like him.

She'd lost her mom when she was 2 years old, and although she couldn't actually remember her, she often told him made up stories about her mommy the princess who took her to tea parties in castles made of candy. It was an innocence that struck raw with him because ultimately they had both, had all, lost someone they needed and eventually found their own unique way to cope.

"Thank you everyone." Todd eventually called time, and subtle conversation slowly started to bubble again.

"You okay?" Tyler whispered to Isabel and she picked her little head up, tears sticking her eyes lashes together.  
"I miss my Mommy,"  
"I know princess, I know, and I miss my Joshie everyday, but that's okay. Because if we keep them in our hearts then that means they'll always always be with us."  
"Mrs Farmer told me, she told me that my mommy's an angel."  
"Yeah that's right, and so's Josh, and I reckon they're friends together in heaven."  
"Best friends?" She asked.  
"Definitely." He nodded, then kissed her on the forehead and put her down again.

"Will, can you take Isabel to see Auntie Flo please?" Todd asked his son and he nodded then took her hand and lead her away from the couple, who immediately embraced each other.

"I'm so proud of you," Tyler whispered into the taller man's trapezius, holding him close and tight.  
"Thank you," Todd murmured back. "Seriously Tyler, thank you, for all of this, everything, thank you. I love you,"  
"I love you."

 

 

"And then Kai walks into our bedroom, syrup all over his cheeks, his ears, his hands, his hair, his pyjamas, everywhere. He walks in carrying a tray right, and there's a plate with maybe 5 or 6 syrup covered strawberries that have all been nibbled to get the stems out if you know what I mean,"  
"Yeah," Tyler grinned as he listened.  
"And he walks over to Jess's side of the bed and places the tray on the blanket and says happy mommy's day with the biggest grin, and he was trying to be sweet and everything, but oh my god I have never seen such a huge mess. I mean we had to throw that damn blanket away because the syrup had acted like fucking super glue and we literally could not peel that tray back off again." Towerblock sighed with laughter as he told his story.  
"Oh God, I could totally picture Isabel doing the exact same." Tyler sighed too.

Out of all of Todd's old friends, Tyler probably liked Towerblock the most. They didn't especially have much in common, except the love for their kids, but he was filled with so many interesting stories that the pair could sit and talk for weeks and never get through them all.

It was pretty early in the day, just gone 10 in the morning, and inside Tom was frying up a huge breakfast for the whole group and Todd and Flo were entertaining the kids somehow, meaning Towerblock and Tyler were free to talk on the decking that overlooked the gorgeous forest surroundings.

The ex-soldier had removed and was cleaning up the metal ankle hinge of his prosthetic leg with a tub of silver polish whilst Tyler casually sipped his pint of water, not overly fussed by the stumped left leg on show. For the first few occasions he couldn't help but stare, but they'd been friends for so long that the urge to scrutinise had worn off.

"He's a good kid though,"  
"Yeah you can tell he's got a good heart,"  
"He's doing really good in school, reading at 8th grade level or something."  
"Oh that's great, good for him." Tyler smiled. "It's always nice to get that sort of news, bit of a confidence booster for him."  
"Yeah definitely." He nodded.

"How's little Issy doing?"  
"She's finding school hard still,"  
"Bless. Does it help having her Papa come in to teach music?"  
"In a way yes, in a way no. I think it's kinda comforting for her to know that I'm there if she needs me, but she's decided she needs me a lot. Like I get a knock on the staffroom door from her every lunch time because she wants to talk, and sometimes she comes at recess too. I'm more than happy to do it of course, but I would prefer she ate lunch with her friends rather than in the staff room."

"Do you know why she'd rather sit with you?"  
"I think it goes back to when she used to get fostered before we adopted her, she's used to being moved around a lot and not really forming any close friendships because they'd be broken. My guess is she's still worried about making friends in case she has to leave them."  
"But she knows that you guys have officially adopted her?"  
"Oh yeah yeah, we tell her all the time that she hasn't got to go anywhere and we're going to look after her,"  
"But a habit's a habit."  
"Exactly." Tyler nodded.

"Babe," Todd came out onto the decking but walked straight over to the balustrade rather than the pair.  
"Yeah?"  
"You haven't seen William have you?"  
"William? No? Why? I thought he was with you."  
"I thought he was in his room but he's not." The anxious father worried, going over to another place to try and look around to see if he could find the child.

"Could he be off with Kai somewhere?" Towerblock offered.  
"Kai's inside, they're all inside except him."  
"Alright, don't stress man, he's a big boy, he's probably just having a snoop around or something."  
"Not like him." Todd stopped walking with his hands on his hips, then slowly rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"I dunno where he is guys, I don't know where my kid is."  
"He's definitely not inside?" Tyler asked, standing up to be by his side.  
"I mean I can check again but I could not find him and I looked everywhere,"  
"Don't panic boss,"  
"Yeah, Towerblock's right, don't panic,"  
"I'm panicking!"

"Have you tried just calling him?" The disabled guy finishing attaching his fake leg and joined the other two in their concerned circle.  
"No cell service out here." Todd sighed again, refusing to make eye contact as he ground his teeth against his lips.  
"When did anyone last see him?"  
"I haven't today."  
"Me neither." Tyler shook his head.  
"What if he's been missing all night? Shit."  
"T, T breathe, I checked on him last night, he was fast asleep in his bed at 11," he reassured his fiancé despite feeling slightly susceptible to panic himself.

"Right, don't get ahead of yourself man, where could he be?"  
"I told him not to leave by himself." Todd stressed.  
"Babe we'll find him okay?" Tyler took then reassuring role as his mind raced.  
"If he's inside then you're going on the next beer run." Towerblock tried to lighten the mood as he went over to the door. "I'll check ground floor, Todd take first, Ty,"  
"Second, got it." Tyler nodded and jogged inside, knowing he had the furthest to go.

William was a good kid, immaculately behaved, and Tyler knew that the odds of him sneaking out to disobey his father were next to none. And I'm a way it was comforting to know that he probably wasn't trouble making, but it also filled Tyler's gut with a sense of dread as he raced up the stairs and started checking each room and throughly but as quickly as he could.

Kidnap seemed unlikely, near impossible since they were in the middle of nowhere and the house was packed full of people who would notice an intruder, but it was a word that wouldn't stop fluttering in the back of his throat as he scanned yet more empty rooms.

Where could he be? Tyler knew he was bored but it wasn't as if there was a lot to do in the surrounding area, and the more he thought about it, the more he panicked. It wasn't a panic attack panic, it was a protective concerned panic that powered him forwards faster.

"Anything?" Todd asked when they met on the first floor stairwell, nervously biting his nails.  
"No, you?"  
"No. Shit!"  
"Todd, Todd look at me, he is fine. We will find him. He is fine."  
"But what if-"  
"Don't do that to yourself, just don't." Tyler told him then pulled him into a hug that he knew his fiancé's anxious heart wasn't in.

"He's not down here!" Towerblock yelled up the stairs and they rushed to join him, getting more and more nervous.  
"What's going on?" Flo was also there by his side, dressed in her camo uniform that she still wore as an active service member.  
"William's gone awol."  
"He's not anywhere." Todd continued to fret and Tyler wrapped a supportive arm around his waist as they talked.

"Well he's gotta be somewhere, where have you looked?"  
"House and just off the decking."  
"So there's loads more places, don't worry Boss, we'll pick him-" she started saying but was interrupted by the father.  
"The fucking lake, shit, the motherfucking lake."  
"He doesn't like the water babe, he won't have gone down there."  
"He never finished swim school because he doesn't like it, shit shit shit,"  
"So he can't swim?" Towerblock tried to make sense of his frantic words.  
"Not very well, shit, Ty what if he's drown-"  
"Don't."

"Listen, Todd, you need to calm down and pull yourself together. Your kid needs you right now, he needs the best you, he doesn't need a worked up messy version." Flo talked some sense into him. "Clear your mind, think about it, come up with a plan. It's what you do best, so let yourself do it, because flapping around here is going to do no good for anybody."  
"O-okay, um," he breathed deeply and took a moment to collect himself.

"Okay, I need a team in a car to go down to the lake, check there's no sign of him down there, then if not then just carry onto the convenience store thing down by the entrance to the forest, make sure he's not buying sweets or something."  
"Got it covered, and I'll take Wyatt, he's lifeguard trained." Flo allocated herself and her husband.  
"Then I need a team or two trawling the forest, maybe half go up the hill half go across? And we meet back here in an hour for an update."  
"Ellie and Tom can stay with the kids," she nominated the couple to stay back. "Then TB and Jess can go across, and Ty and Todd go up?"  
"Okay," Towerblock agreed.

"Or, wait, Tyler are you going to be okay being strong if he works himself up?" The military woman alluded to his mental health without subtlety.  
"I'll be okay."  
"Or do you want me to join that group?" TB offered.  
"Okay that's probably better, so you three start looking in the forest now, I'll tell the others to stay and look after the kids, then Wyatt and I will drive down and check our end before going into the forest to join the effort. Meet back here at 11.30?" She half suggested half told.  
"Great, thank you Flo." Tyler said appreciatively and she smiled before going off to find her husband.

"Anyone want a jacket or anything?" Towerblock asked the couple.  
"Let's go." Todd decided for them and hurriedly stormed towards the door.

"I'm sorry about that, I hope I didn't offend you," TB said discretely as they followed after him.  
"No no it's okay, it's for the best." Tyler agreed, knowing that there was always a possibility he could get sick again, and the current situation ticked all the trigger boxes. However he couldn't feel anything starting, so he hoped that he'd be so focused on the task that his mind wouldn't be able to assault him.

"William! WILLIAM!" Todd started shouting as soon as they left the premises, hiking up the sharp slope effortlessly with his hands cupped around his mouth whilst Tyler gave TB a hand up the first big step off the parking area and up into the natural woodland so that his prosthetic didn't cause him any issues.

"WILLLIAAM!"  
"WILL!" Tyler joined in the effort, picking up speed as he looked around and weaved between trees.  
"WILLIAM!"  
"WILLL!"  
"WIIILLLL!"

As they spread apart ever so slightly and looked every way they could, Tyler could feel his heart pounding, starting to feel genuinely scared about the severity of the situation. He wasn't at crisis point, but he was having to take conscious control of his breathing.

"WILLIAM! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?! JESUS CHRIST WILLIAM PLEASE!" Todd screamed desperately and Towerblock shot Tyler a worried glance.  
"Babe," Tyler made his way over to walk close by his side.  
"WILLIAM!"  
"WILL?" Towerblock yelled as well be less harshly.

"Remember last year, when we climbed those trees? Where was that?" Tyler asked and they both thought about it before the shaking father answered.  
"That way."  
"Maybe he's gone back there? He really enjoyed it last time."

Todd was momentarily quiet as he contemplated the suggestion, and Tyler started leading the way he had pointed. They'd only been walking for a few more seconds before suddenly the distinctive bang and echo of a gunshot ripped through the forest and he jumped as his head shot up to look for the source.

"Hello?" He called out.  
"Tyler. Get down." Towerblock hissed and he turned around to see that both of the soldiers had instinctively dropped to the ground and braced themselves for an attack. His stomach dropped, not because he was scared of the gun, but because he could see the terror in Todd's borderline flashback glazed eyes.

"We're safe, it's okay, it was a rifle, probably someone out rabbit hunting, it's okay." He tried to reassure them whilst also being aware that they could shoot at them mistakenly, or worse, at William.

"Hello?! HELLO! DON'T SHOOT! HELLO?!"  
"Sorry about that," an older man appeared from the shadows of some trees in the distance with a rifle under his arm and a bird in his hand, and Tyler recognised him as their landlord almost instantly. "Oh hello Tyler,"  
"Hi Steve,"  
"Just heading back, I won't disturb you anymore,"  
"Don't suppose you've seen William have you?"  
"William?"  
"My son, short, 12 years old, light hair, blue eyes."  
"Oh yes I know the one,"  
"You've seen him?" He asked hopefully.  
"Not today, no, why?"  
"He's run off somewhere I think."  
"Boys will be boys hey,"

"We're worried," Tyler decided to ignore the sexist comment. "So if you see him, send him to the lodge?"  
"Course, course, good luck."  
"Thanks Steve." He forced a smile and the man disappeared off again, and Tyler returned to the two soldiers a short distance back.

They were both sat up on the soil, but Todd did not look in good shape and Tyler's stomach did a back flip. He knew how anxious and afraid he was of fireworks, let alone actual gunfire.

"It was just Steve, the guy who owns the lodge, and he's going to his place now, okay?" He crouched down supportively by them.  
"He's just a bit, you know," Towerblock whispered.  
"I know,"  
"We're not out there anymore though Boss, we're home, home with our families." The soldier said but Todd didn't stop staring at a patch of soil in front of him.  
"T? Babe,"  
"Do you want to go back to the lodge Boss?"  
"I need to find my fucking kid." Todd sniffed quietly, standing up and walking away.

"He's got, uh, got bad memories. Iraq." TB said discreetly to Tyler as they followed after him.  
"Do you think I should go to him?"  
"Don't sneak up from behind, but yeah."  
"K," Tyler jogged yet again to catch up with his fiancé.

"Todd, Todd it's just me, okay, Todd."  
"Where the fuck is he Ty?" Todd finally made eye contact with him, tears clouding his vision as he stopped walking and turned to face him. Thankfully TB gave them some space so that Tyler could reach out and hold him as the tears trickled.

"You're safe." He whispered comfortingly but knew he wasn't being believed. "You're safe, we'll find him, we'll be okay I promise."  
"What if they've got him."  
"Who?"  
"The, the, the," Todd couldn't say Taliban.  
"It wasn't anyone to be scared of, that gunfire, it was just Steve. There's nobody out here to get you or me or our boy, okay?"  
"I, shit, this is so fucking hard." He rushed to wipe his face as he trembled.

"I know babe, I know. But look, you're not out there again, we're in the woods, the American woods where you're in control, not them. Smell the soil, touch the trees, breathe the air, ground yourself. Because you're here, with me, and you're safe."

"Let's, um, let's find him."  
"Are you sure you don't want to head back? I'll keep looking, you calm down?"  
"I can't calm down not knowing where he is." Todd said, reaching out and resting his shaking hand on Tyler's chest, finding the cross pendant and wedding ring that belonged to Josh under the cotton shirt he wore.

"He's helping us." Tyler reassured him, knowing that Josh was protecting them and especially protecting William, wherever he was.

"Can you keep it together? For William?"  
"For William." Todd nodded tearfully. "And you."  
"We'll find him." Tyler kissed him on the forehead gently then held his hand and started walking again, feeling the sweat of his palm.

"WILLIAM!" Towerblock bellowed, walking slightly to their left as they went deeper into the trees.  
"Will! It's Tyler! WILL!"

"What do we do if we can't find him?" Todd asked fearfully and quietly.  
"We will."  
"But if we don't?"  
"We go back to the house, get everyone to join in and we scour this whole forest in a big line. If we can't find him, we go down hill, right down to the lake and do the same. Then we talk to the locals, put something on Facebook maybe, and eventually call the police." Tyler tried to not sound as terrified as he was. "And the whole time, every step of the way, we pray. We ask those ones above who care so deeply for us to send a blessing our way, to guide us to him. We keep praying and we keep searching, okay?"  
"Okay." He sniffed.

"But it's only been 10 minutes, yeah? We're not at that point just yet, for all we know he might just be right over that hill."  
"WILLIAM!" Todd yelled again and Tyler squeezed his hand. "WILLIAM PLEASE!"

"Todd, Ty," Towerblock called and both their heads whipped round.  
"What? What is it?" Todd jogged over to his old colleague.  
"Is this his?" He revealed a Cavs cap that Tyler had bought him forever ago and he rarely wore, but often kept with him for the gesture and symbolism of the gift.  
"Shit." Todd nodded with his hands on his head.  
"No no this is a good thing, it means he was here, means he's not down by the lake." Tyler explained and his fiancé let out a strange tearful mix of relief and laughter.

"Should I go back to the house and try and call Flo and Wyatt to tell them?" He offered as he passed Todd the cap.  
"Probably best you stay with us, just in case." Tyler wrapped his hand around Todd's lower back.  
"Okay."  
"I'll try call them here, see if there's cell service." Todd took out his phone and started looking for bars whilst wandering around a little.

Tyler sighed, anxiety weighing heavy on his already exhausted shoulders, and kept walking in roughly the same direction but slightly more to the right in case William had gone off that way.

Todd was staring at his phone as he moved and TB was on the other side of him, and Tyler kept looking and kept looking until suddenly he saw a flash of blue that didn't blend with the forest around them.

Curious, and a little excited, and very close to tears, he went closer and sure enough saw William. The young boy was crouched only 2 or 3 metres away from where a fully grown and majestic stag was bowing to sip from a small puddle, and William was snapping away with his camera raised to his eye, completely oblivious to the panic and distress he had caused his family.

For a moment Tyler stood and watched the amazing event unfold, in awe of how calm they both were, but it was over in a second when Todd caught on and immediately raced towards his son and scared the deer off and scared him too by the looks of it.

"William where the FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN YOU STUPID STUPID BOY?! You scared me SHITLESS! Fucking Hell I thought you were FUCKING DEAD! DON'T EVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN!" Todd yelled and shook him by the upper arms, then pulled him into an uncomfortably tight hug as the younger joined his father in crying.

"I'm sorry!"  
"Sorry's not good enough! This isn't okay! You NEVER RUN OUT LIKE THAT AGAIN!"  
"I, I, I just wanted to take some p-pictures,"  
"YOU ASK ME FIRST WILLIAM BARRICK! YOU FUCKING ASK ME FIRST!"  
"Todd," Tyler felt he had to step in between the emotional pair. "William, you had us all really worried champ,"  
"I'm sorry," he wept, frightened.  
"It's okay," he sighed then held his arms out and embraced the crying child himself, relieved to finally have him close.

"Are you okay William? Are you hurt at all?" Towerblock asked and he shook his head no as Tyler let go.  
"No you're not okay?" Tyler asked concerned.  
"I'm okay, I, I, I'm n-not hu-urt."  
"You're in so much trouble young man." Todd spat with his hands on his hips. "So much fucking trouble."

William quickly glanced up with his tear filled eyes at Tyler in a moment of panic, a moment of fear. It was true that Todd still possessed the intimidation factor that came with being a corporal and, had Tyler not known it came from a place of love, he would have been scared too. So he simply gave William a little reassuring nod as if to say, don't worry, I'll protect you, I'll always protect you, you don't need to be afraid.

 

 

"It was scary Mom, I mean I managed to keep a level head but only because Todd was on the verge of a meltdown and I had to fill the role. If I'd been alone then I would have collapsed, it was awful."  
"I'm sorry baby," she said down the phone after he recalled his rather dramatic day to her whilst sitting by the outdoor fire. Everyone else was either putting their kids to bed or packing ready to leave after lunch the next day, giving him some free time to talk to her.

"I just,"  
"Scared of losing him."  
"Yeah," Tyler sighed as he watched the flames grow smaller.  
"You've had your loss darling, you've had your life crumbling loss already, I promise you won't suffer another. William's not going anywhere."

"It was weird. When we were in the forest and Todd was upset, he reached out and touched my necklace for comfort."  
"Josh's necklace? And wedding ring?"  
"Yeah," he sighed again, determined not to get upset.  
"Why's that weird for you baby? I still wear that bracelet he bought me for my birthday, and if I'm ever missing him I dig it out and stroke it. I think it helps us to feel connected to him."  
"I do the same with his ring, I just, I dunno, they never even met, why's it comforting for him?"  
"I think it says a lot of good things about both you and Josh. I think it says that you clearly talk about him a lot, not all the time, but often enough that Todd always listens and always remembers and builds up a character in his mind that he thinks of when you next mention him. And I think it says a lot about Josh and his personality that, even from the grave, he has the ability to flood people with bravery and strength and support."

Hearing the word, grave, still struck Tyler deeply in his chest when he envisioned the man who he loved so deeply simply becoming at one with the soil he was buried in. Decomposing to nothing but a pile of bones and memories. But he was determined to stay in control of his tears, so hurried them away.

"Todd knows what Josh did for you. He wanted some of that encouragement himself. I think I understand why he would do what he did, do you?"  
"I think so." The son replied, running his finger along his hem. "It was just another emotion to add to a long list today."  
"And I'm so unbelievably proud of you for staying healthy throughout."  
"Thanks Mom."

"You used to run away aalll the time when you were a little boy."  
"I'd hardly say 19 was little."  
"I didn't mean, well, well yes you did used to run away then too, but I meant when you were really little."  
"Oh yeah?" He yawned.  
"Yep, when you were 5 you were a runner. We knew that so we had all those child lock gates installed, but didn't take you long to figure out you could climb over them."  
"Where did I run to?"  
"We were never far behind you so I'm not really sure where your end goal was, but the furthest you got was the conifer tree outside Mrs Brown's house."

"Pop?" A small voice whispered and he looked up to see William stood there with his tears in his eyes.  
"Hey William, I'm on the phone to Nanny Kelly, do you wanna say hello?" He gestured for him to come and sit on his lap and, perhaps a little surprisingly, he did.

"Mom, it's William." Tyler announced as he put the device on speakerphone.  
"Hey you,"  
"Hi Na-anna," he hiccuped.  
"You've had a bit of an exciting day by the sounds of it hey?"  
"I just wanted s-some p-ph-ohotos."  
"Did you get some good ones?" She asked as Tyler stroked his back with his thumb.  
"I, I, I d-don't know,"  
"Well maybe a bit later you and Pop can go through them, then you can send me your favourites? Would that be okay?"  
"Okay." William whispered.  
"Thank you cupcake. Now, do you wanna talk to Pop?"  
"Y-yeah,"  
"Alright, I'll leave you two to it, but call me back later Ty?"  
"I will Mom,"  
"Bye boys,"  
"Bye,"  
"Bye Mom, love you." Tyler pressed the red icon then turned his full attention to the sniffling boy on his lap.

"S'going on bud?"  
"Dad won't talk to me." His bottom lip trembled.  
"He's busy packing Will,"  
"He's not! He, he came in and he spoke to Issy, they were hugging a-and talking, and he i-i-ignored me!"  
"Okay," Tyler sighed and hugged him closer whilst making sure he was still comfy.

"You know, today, today was one of the hardest and the scariest days of Dad's life, that's what he told me earlier. He was so scared because he couldn't find you William, and in his mind he was thinking about how much he loves you and needs you, and how awful life would be without you."  
"B-but, but I'm here! I'm here now! Why doesn't he want me now!" William cried.  
"He does want you, he does want you Will."  
"I s-sa-id I-I'm s-s-sorry,"  
"I know you did, I know."

"Papa I d-do-n't kn-n-now w-wh-a-at to d-do,"  
"He just needs time, okay?" Tyler held him tight. "It must be so scary and you're being so brave, but he just needs some time to process everything that happened today. This trip is always really difficult, what with Peter, and today he also had to deal with gunfire and almost losing you. That's a lot to wrap his head around. But that's not your fault so don't feel guilty."  
"I, I, I ran off,"  
"You followed a stag, you weren't trying to hurt anyone, I know that." He nuzzled into him.

"I just, I, I," William tried to find what he wanted to say. "This, here, it, it's for Peter and everyone comes because they're sad he's dead and you're sad Josh is dead and Issy's sad her mom's dead and now I've been horrid and made everyone sadder."  
"Will," Tyler let out a deep sigh and stroked the young boy's hair. "We're not sad because you're here, we love that you're here, we love you. It's just earlier we were worried and that's because we care about you so deeply. That's not something you should even consider apologising for."

"Everyone would be happy if I wasn't here."  
"Now that's not true young man. You're my number 1, my sidekick, my partner in crime, my mini me, what would I do without you?" He tried not to think of all the times he had said the sentence himself.

"When I lost Josh, when the world lost Josh, I went on this huge huge huge downwards nose dive, and my life was horrible quite frankly William, it was really horrible for a really long time, in fact it was so horrible that some days I didn't even want to be alive anymore. I was so confused and so angry and so scared and so so sad, and I didn't ever think I would be able to feel happy ever again in my whole life." Tyler tried to explain with a suitable yet meaningful summary. "And your dad, Todd, he has felt just like me because he's lost his best friend in the past. He knows what that sadness really feels like because he remembers it from all those years ago, it's impossible to forget."  
"Yeh,"

"And today Dad thought you were gone too William, I know it might feel like we're overreacting, but we were really worried and Dad got stuck on this idea that you were dead. He was so so scared of feeling that sadness all over again and not having you with him that he panicked. He panicked and now I think he feels a little bit silly because he didn't need to panic, but I also think that he's been reminded how awful it is to feel so sad, and that's why he's in a bad mood. He's not angry at you, he's scared of feeling that sadness again. Does that make sense?"  
"Y-yeah,"

"I'm not mad." A voice said and they both looked up to see that Todd was stood in the shadows, and stepped forwards to sit in another chair around the fire.

"I'm not mad at you William, I'm not disappointed, I'm not anything towards you. I've just been overwhelmed today, and I am so sorry for taking that out on you." Tyler's fiancé said slowly and sincerely.  
"O-o-kay,"  
"Come sit here," he held his arm out and the boy climbed off Tyler and onto Todd. "Do you remember when you were a little boy, and I wasn't very well?"  
"I, I, yeah, I, kinda."  
"All the crazy things I used to do? Sitting in the corner of the kitchen to eat, having mirrors in every corridor, having a safe room. Do you remember that?"  
"You, um, you used t-to make me practice on Tuesdays. In case someone came in, I had to know where to hide."  
"Yeah, the drills, all of that." Todd nodded and so did William.

"It was because going to war, being in Iraq, it changed the way my mind works. Out there there really are people trying to hurt you, and I couldn't stop imagining that people were trying to hurt me and the people I love here in America too. I was always scared of you being hurt because I wasn't a good soldier and didn't look after you. And I've got a lot better, I don't feel as scared anymore, but being here with all of my army friends and thinking about Peter and what happened to him and to us as a unit, I've been on edge this trip."  
"You've been feeling unwell? With, with,"  
"It's called PTSD, yes." Todd nodded.

"And today, coming up with a military plan, going on a mission, tracking through the forests, then hearing gunfire. It was really easy for my brain to slip back into solider style."  
"Y-yeah."  
"So when I saw you, I wasn't thinking like a dad, I was thinking like a soldier. That's why I was so strict and stern with you, I was being a soldier not a daddy. And I'm really sorry."

"I, I don't, um, I don't like it, you know, when you feel unwell or when Papa Ty feels unwell with your, um,"  
"Mental health." Tyler offered him the words and he nodded.  
"M-mental health, because, I, it feels, I, because I don't know what to do to make it better."  
"Kiddo, it's not your job to make us better, okay? That's not your burden to carry. And everyday you make us better without even realising, you do it naturally with your kindness and your love. You don't need to do anymore." Todd reassured him.

"William, do you remember what I said a few minutes ago about my nose dive?" Tyler said and the boy nodded whilst wiping his face. "I got better, I got to the point where I am today because I managed to get better. You helped that, you and Dad, more than anything else. I wouldn't be as healthy and stable as I am without you."  
"Me?"  
"Yeah little dude, and I bet you never even knew what you were doing."  
"You do so much good without realising." Todd agreed, pressing his lips to his son's temple. "Which is why I love you, we love you, so much."  
"I love you too."

"Come on, gimme a kiss." Todd pointed to his cheekbone and William pecked him, then climbed off his lap and went over to Tyler and did the same.  
"Why don't you run up and grab your camera and then we'll pick some from today to send to Nanny Kelly?"  
"O-okay," William wiped his face then hurried back towards the house whilst Tyler stood up and went and sat next to Todd, greeting him with a long kiss on the lips.

"I really scared him, didn't I?"  
"You yourself were scared babe, he understands."  
"Were you?" Todd asked.  
"Me? I was worried but I trusted him to make sensible choices."  
"Not that, I meant were you scared of me? When I shouted?"  
"Oh, uh," Tyler tried to think back so to give a truthful answer.

"I was scared that William would get overwhelmed and run off and then things would get physical, but no, I wasn't and am not scared of you."  
"Physical? What do you mean babe?"  
"Like tackling him and carrying him kicking and screaming back to the house." He explained. "I dunno, it just, you remember my year of Hell I talk about sometimes?"  
"After Debby, when Josh was abroad."  
"Yeah. Back then I wasn't in control and many many times I was dragged home kicking and screaming, and I can still remember and still feel that terror deep somewhere within me, and I'd never wish for William to be in that situation." He explained. "But luckily he's far more rational than I was."

"Things like that, like what you just said, I think that's what makes reintegration so hard." Todd leant against the back of the bench with a sigh and Tyler cuddled against his chest. "You managed to legitimately link something that I had previously considered unrelated to a bad time in your past. I think I still do that subconsciously, like the seemingly most random things remind me of Iraq, and that makes it so difficult to avoid any sort of triggers and so hard to move on."

"I find it with Josh too."  
"Oh yeah?"  
"Weirdest things remind me of him, the streaky reds of a sunset sky, homemade French toast, 50 cent coins."  
"So what do you do?" He asked, thumb stroking Tyler's arm fondly.  
"I let myself be reminded."  
"Yeah,"  
"I know a husband and a war zone are clearly very different, but they both hold a lot of pain for us. I let myself be exposed to that pain occasionally because I grow used to it and able to cope. Maybe today was so hard for you with Iraq triggers because you're used to a completely sheltered environment."  
"Maybe." Todd hummed.

"It's like OCD exposures too in a way, it fucking sucks but I've gotta do it if I wanna get better."  
"But how do I do exposure? I can't exactly go back for a visit or meet up with the Taliban or have a guy sneak up and try and shoot me."  
"No no no of course not. Little things, little things. Like what I was saying about French toast and Josh. Small things which hold memories. Have you got anything like that?"  
"I'll have to have a think." Todd said then pecked him on the crown of his head.

"Daddy Papa Daddy Papa look!" A little voice ran down the decking and over to them.  
"Isabel aren't you meant to be in bed?" Tyler smiled and she grinned and held her hands cupped together.  
"Look Papa!" She said proudly, then opened up her hands ever so slightly to reveal a beautifully large moth.  
"Oh wow,"  
"That's amazing darling." Todd agreed. "Did you catch that all by yourself?"  
"Yeah! It, i-it was in my bedroom!"  
"Wow,"

"William look!" The young girl grinned, her pyjamas blowing in the gentle wind as her brother rejoined the family with his camera in his hands. "A butterfly!"  
"It's a moth Issy, it's like a night time butterfly." William said as he sat on Tyler's lap and Isabel giggled as the creature's wings flapped against her palms.  
"But it's still really cool." Todd said.  
"Yeah, and you're really really brave for holding it." William told his sister and she giggled again, and Tyler smiled proudly.

"Will! Take a photo of us!"  
"Of you and the moth?" He asked, taking the cap off his lens.  
"He's called Barry." Issy declared proudly and they all laughed as the youngest boy knelt a little to get the perfect angle.  
"Barry, smile!" He called and clicked the button a few times and Isabel laughed with joy as the animal escaped and flew away into the night sky.

"And now of me!" She struck a pose, one hand under her chin and one leg twisting on her tippy toes. Tyler saw William grin behind the camera as he took half a dozen images.  
"My daughter, a supermodel." Todd put his hands on her waist and lifted her onto his lap.  
"Should we do a family one?" William asked.  
"That would be lovely Will, great idea." Tyler nodded.  
"Okay, shuffle together,"  
"Nah come on kiddo, it's not a family photo without you, come sit on Pop's lap. Flo! FLO! Oi! FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE!" Todd called over his shoulder to the solider inside the house, and she appeared a moment later.

"I was summoned?"  
"Take a picture of the four of us?"  
"Say please Daddy." Isabel poked him and made Tyler laugh.  
"Pleeaase."  
"Yeah course, oh, how does his work?" She took William's camera from him and waited for the 12 year old to explain.  
"Just, um, here let me adjust this a second,"  
"Your kid is a genius Boss," Flo shook her head in disbelief as he altered some dial thingy.

"You have to look through that bit, half press that button, I did autofocus for you so just wait, then press it down all the way."  
"Alright I think I've got it." She still looked confused as William climbed up onto Tyler's lap and the family squeezed together. "Smile!"

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all, remember me?? I'm 2 weeks into my new boarding school and LOVING it, except I'm so busy that I never have any time to write :(  
> I'm doing my best and I have a new fic with a fairly untouched idea (thanks to a suggestion) which I'm really proud of. Not really sure when I'll next post but please don't think I've forgotten about you all. Still love my Ao3 babes <3 xx  
> Hope you're well x


End file.
